Am I past my best?

Posted: February 4, 2011 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , ,

I’ve been digging through my old unpublished work. Not a great thing to do when tired and dispirited (although the windy day and the fact that the fence has blown down twice in 24 hours has caused the dismay, not my writing) but I do seriously wonder if I’m losing my touch.

I’m not sure if other writers are stupid enough to revisit unsold manuscripts. Maybe they just get on with the one in hand.

Well, I was trying to, honestly. But on Wednesday I was woken at an ungodly hour and asked to speak on radio just a short while later, which scuppered my morning’s work. And on Thursday I was up to my ears in a mid-way deadline for my journal. Today, I had a morning appointment in the heart of Newcastle, which meant an early Metro train ride in, as I don’t do parking in the city. And there was the week gone.

I know I stand guilty of not trying harder to keep going in the face of daily adversity, but that hiatus is what caused the unplanned browsing of the aforementioned pieces. I looked at two novels for children and three other short pieces of children’s fiction and a radio short story.

The outcome was that I found myself wondering if someone else had written some of the sentences and the dialogue. I just don’t think anything I write these days is as good. I can’t even believe I did it. So that leaves me with two possibilities.

1 Do I give up because I’m past my best?

2 Do I resurrect these manuscripts and try to place them?

Or (yes, I know this is a third option) shall I just wait for the sun to come out so I feel better? Bear in mind we haven’t even got a snowdrop pushing through yet.

Anyway, while I’m thinking about it, this weekend I have to arrange four Lothian Dragons sessions for Framwellgate Primary School in Durham. I didn’t use to do that sort of thing in the old days so at least there is no comparison to depress me. And I absolutely love working with the young people, so even thinking about it has lifted the gloom. Now where are my dragon models, bookmarks and dragon talismans?


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